And then Barbie mounted the other llama

It's actually been a week since my last entry...I have once more become a weekly blogger...so sorry! For anybody out there (hi Mum) who's been checking back to see if I have updated and discovered I haven't posted anything, I'm really sorry. I'm not really sure why I never seem to be here to post anymore...it might be because the weeks are going so fast that I can't keep up or it might be because I'm really lazy or it might be because I have actually been out living a little bit rather than sitting at my computer screen, and this is a good thing, right? For me it is everything. To have actually had a weekend where I feel like one of the things on my life long bucket list has finally been fulfilled. Bearing in mind, this is something I've been wishing for since I was about 10 years old that has finally been fulfilled. I'm not going into details. Some of you know what I am talking about. Just to say: I feel really good about this and it has filled me with a completely new vigour for life. It seems to be that I actually have the potential to be treated as a normal girl, not a girl people think it is alright to say to 'You're a bit strange'. I am. But it's not okay to say so. Everything seems a bit more HD in life. Hallelujah.

It's been nearly two months since I arrived here now and I can't believe it. I feel already like I have grown up in so many ways and learnt so much. I have met so many people lately that just seem like they're worth knowing. This makes me really excited that I have the potential to have a large and varied group of friends here. I feel like inside I am a warmer, happier person than beforehand. I am also a bit less of a cry baby. My skin is getting so thick that things just bounce of me like a Mr Bump/Mr Strong collision...That's right. I don't mean to boast, but I can literally read Mr. Strong from start to finish without the book in front of me. Impressive, right?

I had an extra class last Friday and it was really cool. We had class in a tapas bar..and no, the irony wasn't lost on me ordering tapas in German...It was nice though, it felt more like an evening out with friends, than being students and a teacher. We even all said goodbye to each other with literal cheek kisses on street corners. I felt like a major European. I really wish this sort of thing happened at home too. People'd be a lot happier in life! I would be anyway... ;)

What's been happening lately? That's a good question. Except for my obvious self revelations, I've learnt so much more about how people work too. I've made friends. I've lost some too. It's a shame. But I'm trying to live without regrets. On a similar vein, Fizzy Man and me are now on the outs. He sent me a text message today saying 'You're a silly girl. You do things I don't approve of. I don't have time for silly little girls.' I couldn't even bring myself to respond. The children told it true though. They shook their heads at his cheek when I read the message and said 'You should not marry Fizzy Man. You will find someone better.' On the plus side, I got married to a five year old while we were pretending an elaborate make believe in which he was a pretty red haired woman in a nice dress smoking a cigarette and I was a really cool handsome man also smoking a cigarette. Match made in heaven.

Today I was watching Barbie the llama with the children and she suddenly legged it after the other llama down the field. Ever saw a llama run? It's worth a watch...seriously. Anyway, we instantly thought it was a fight between two female llamas...and then I noticed something. And thought...'Oh crap, is she gonna...no, she can't be, she's a she...' and suddenly it was the bathroom scene in Mrs Doubtfire all over again. Turns out love is in the air on the llama farm. And Barbie? Barbie is a dude.

This weekend I went to Zurich on Saturday to watch the GAA 10 year celebration tournament. It was great. I couldn't believe the crowd of Irish people all in one place. They had come from all over the North of Switzerland to compete and socialise. For me it was a great chance to meet some new people. And I did meet some people I really dug. And people I definitely want to see again. The only problem being making friends with people who live upwards of two hours away. Will they ever be bothered having to make the train journey to hang out? Will I ever buy the half-price ticket for train travel?? All these questions, and a few more. It was a great day, though.  I wasn't home until 1AM which is practically sunrise by my normal standards of bed time going. 

Yesterday I went to see the end of the Basel half-marathon as two guys I'm friends with here were competing. It was a cool day to get out as well. It was lovely to hang out with three people who really have been good friends to me since arriving here, even though I'm a bit of a pain. Not to mention the wee baby, who sometimes is necessary to restore my faith in the goodness and sweetness of little ones. We all went for lunch. Where I managed to get sunburnt. Under an umbrella. On a cloudy day. I had a lovely salad worth mentioning just because it was both peaches and feta cheese and yet was still delicious- such a good combo actually!!

We all went to the pub in the afternoon and I got a chance to for once have a bit of a girly gossip with my friend outside. It was great because normally there's no other girls about. I also got a chance to chat to some awesome people I already know and meet some new people. It always surprises me to get compliments. And when people are so nice to me. People were saying my accent is beautiful. Never usually get told that. And one really nice guy offered to basically be my friend if I wanted to go to the cinema or for dinner or for anything really- how nice is that??

If I was to review this weekend...I'd be getting near to 10/10. The only real problem I'm having at the minute is my usual post-weekend fret that I imagined all of these lovely people I met were actually interested in me and actually wanted to see me again. You never can tell. Other than that, I feel pretty much complaint free. I feel like a Cheshire Cat if I stop to think of how far I've come from when I first arrived. So here it is, I'm happy. I have a place here. Almost. I'm so close I can touch it. I just need to reach a little bit more...

Anway, fingers crossed this entry will take me up to the 2000 views mark on my blog. Thank you for reading, watch this space....for the next manic depressive rant is due, I guess!

And remember, always check your llamas for phalluses before you name them after female icons. ;)

Lasagne, cannelloni, spaghetti...

It's literally a Black Swan!!!

 Hello, and how are you? Today it's Monday and I just spilt an entire bottle of water over myself- classic. Here we are, on the eve of the beginning of another week, and I'm sure you've all had amazing weekends, right? Of course you have, Downton Abbey is finally back on television- wayhey! What will Lady Violet do next?? And that Thomas...what a rogue!!

This weekend I ventured out of my usual standard weekend plans a little bit. I even ventured a little bit outside of my standard country of residence here. On Saturday I went to Lorrach in Germany. Just for a spot of light shopping.

Kangaroos!

I went with one of my lovely new friends from the Irish Club. It was nice to get to chat to a girl for a change. Well, that is, a girl that I actually like talking to. There are not many of those. We had a great time shopping, and I totally got a few bargains in H and M...and a huge loaf of bread.

The view mid- hike

But, of course, it wouldn't be a blog entry if I didn't inform you that once more I attracted some freaks. This is my favourite weird encounter yet, I have to say. It still makes me laugh. There we were, getting into a lift in the train station in Germany, having literally just arrived. An older Italian man joins us. After shaking hands with us, he proceeds to say 'Spaghetti, lasagne, canelloni, linguine' and just lists different types of pasta.

Why?

If this had been any sort of omen for future events, I'd hazard a guess that it's a bad one. He was hard to shake off too. He walked behind us naming pastas and occasionally saying 'Bella! Italia! Mama!' while I smiled indulgently and tried to make my nervous laughter natural.

It was a pattern which continued for the rest of the shopping trip. For some reason, I just attract freaks. It is a scientific fact. Whether they want to tell me funny things, or try and touch me, or just ask directions: there they'll be, wherever I lead.

The rest of the afternoon/evening was spent at her house in Basel and we got yummy Chinese food and talked and it was just so lovely to have a girl to confide in, the sort of little things you just really need to tell your female friends that boys just wouldn't want to listen to. It's nice to be in confidence with someone, it's all very Jane Austen.                                                                   

Sunday morning I had a bit of a panic of 'Oh no! I've got not plans. What am I going to do??' So I went for a lovely long walk with the doggy for an hour and we got into all sorts of routes I hadn't been yet. Unfortunately, she was trying her best to seduce the boy doggies so insisted on stopping to bat her eyelashes and, well, show them her bottom (not very polite!) on a constant basis. It was amazing to watch.

Luckily, upon my return, I discovered that I had an invitation to go hiking in the afternoon with my friends Sam and Christelle. Donning my best shorts and walking shoes, I excitedly awaited my opportunity to stretch my legs. I headed down to catch a bus in the village. I was seated comfortably waiting for it to leave, and it began to fill up with OAPs. I made some polite small talk with the old lady next to me. And then, as the engine started, I realised I was on the wrong bus. I leaped from my seat in a Tom Cruise stunt double style, dived through the crowds of the elderly with some hurried Enschuldigungs and managed to get off just before the doors rolled shut.

Add caption

Seated on the right bus, I was able to start my journey.

Oh look, we're standing next to a herd of cows...in their field.

We were really a funny group. All of us had a different first language and a bit of both other languages. It might have made for some confusing times but somehow we managed it just fine. It was excellent practice for my German, and for my exceedinly rusty and almost forgotten French. We had some good times. Singing into a carrot, doing Karrotoke- oooh it's so bad it's good!, writing my own Ten Commandments on a slate in a cage, performing a lively rendition of 'If You're Happy and You Know It' with all actions included, getting lost and wandering through fields of cows. Asking 'Is that fence electric?' and getting through it fine, only to be shocked by a different fence- Alanis Morisette might have something to say about that. It ended up being a 3 hour something hike so it was pretty energetic and also educational and it just felt like a very healthy sort of day. We ended our walk back at their house in the village next to mine and we had a lovely pizza dinner and a drink of champagne and a further chance to practice our languages.

 I've enjoyed my weekend a lot, and I am really looking forward to next weekend as well. I'm going the whole way to Zurich, there is DEFINITELY going to be a few freaks talking to me en route!!!

The countryside where I was walking was beautiful and definitely worth a visit. The little Geman town of Lorrach is definitely worth going to for getting the same clothes 15 minutes away for half the price. Amazing.

Meanwhile, I am learning the true meaning of 'Sticks and stones' in work at the minute...but I guess you can't file a bullying in the work place report against a 5 year old, can you? But words still hurt!

Hope you're all well and haven't been too bored by my blog tonight! I'm sure there'll be a big drama soon enough and then everyone (but me) will be ecstatic!

The funny business with Danny Zuco

Tonight I am having a calm evening of self reflection and relaxation, i.e. eating M and Ms, practicing my gangam dancing: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JFkXT49dKz0&feature=g-all-u and wishing I had somebody to talk to. All day I've been filled with a need to blog out my frustrations and I've been looking forward to this moment so much. The last few entries I've been very aware that I have people who are reading it and who are reading it with certain expectations and hang ups and judgments and I'm worried I have compromised who I am in this blog. I don't want that. I am me. This is for me. This is basically my diary so when I say things here they're heartfelt. I am a peanut m and m, cracked open with my centre exposed.

For some reason, and this could be due to any number of things, I'm having a day today where I just feel like I've gotten stuck between a rut and a hard place. Maybe it's a distinct lack of plans this weekend, or the few tangible friendships I thought I'd built here feeling a bit imaginary at the minute, or maybe it's just one of those days, but I just feel like I am in major need of some time apart.

Anyway, this is probably making for a pretty rubbish blog entry so I will promptly stop thinking about things and tune out of myself, because I have had some funny moments in the last week. That's right, it's been almost a whole week since my last blog entry. I've been taking some time off. A vacation without any holiday days. And now I'm back...to let you know, I can really shake it down! (Sorry, accidental but necessary Dirty Dancing reference)

What has been pretty much a constant in my life for a number of years is the feeling that my life might actually just be an episode of awkward. If you haven't saw this television show, you're missing out. It's funny and true and nice and shocking and...well, awkward. It's one of my true pleasures in life at the minute to watch all the episodes. If you enjoy the awkwardness of my blog, you'll also love this show.

Yesterday evening, I went out for dinner with several of the people from the BIC (Basel Irish Club) in this lovely restaraunt in KleinBasel called Volkshaus. It was yummy (pretty pricey) but yummy (we didn't have to tip.) I had the wurst und kase salat mit pomme frites (sausage and cheese salad with chips) It's one of the local classics and reaaaallly nice, I love the sausages and the cheese over here so it was win win for me. If anybody asks me how I'm enjoying Switzerland, I usually answer along the lines of 'Cheese. Yum. Me likey.' I guess that's why people have stopped asking me how it's all going. Or asking me anything. This seems an ideal time to place an ironic saying :TGIF....

 
Anyway, while out for dinner, there was also a Swiss woman who was sitting with us. So, along the lines of asking politely 'Why are you with the Irish club' I was told a story. A very long story. With lots of background. And a pretty awkward ending. Basically, the short of it, she fell for an Irish man...there was 'funny business'...he was married....wife read a letter she wrote to him...all hell broke loose, or as she said it 'The s*** well and truly hit the fan.' You know, the usual story. She was quite a character. But there was weird moment when I was looking at her, and thinking, and reading her novel she set on the table. And thinking some more. Hold on, she was an au pair, she's now and author, she seems to have appallingly bad luck with any/all males: it's future me! And then I got very deep. I was thinking, is this an inevitable end result? Is there any way for me to change this? I don't want to be the eccentric older woman who is still relegated to being a passing fancy for a man, even when she is older and has children. But she still has no luck?? So I was having an early-20s crisis, and I could sense I was pushing the button on the bus, shouting 'let me off at this stop, I don't like where we're heading', but it wasn't stopping, and the more I pushed the button, the more I was becoming an eccentric maniac pushing a button. I already am that girl that people describe as 'funny'. Crap. Is it too late? Am I ever going to be able to escape this path? Will I have to acquire a cat with a name starting with Mr something, an eccentric plum smoking jacket and an abundance of clashing clothes which I wear defiantly in public occasions while I talk loudly over people? I don't really want to do any of these things but I don't know if I have a choice anymore. I've always been told I'm funny. I have already been served the death sentence.

Danny Zuco

Jess Mariano

At lunch today, a very funny and rather teenaged thing happened. It had been building up for a while. There is a building site directly ajoined to the house here. There is a builder who looks like a cross between Danny Zuco (Grease) and Jess Mariano (Gilmore Girls). Anyway, I've been eyeing him up every time he comes around to work, because there's never anything much to look at while I'm working, and it's nice that if I have to play Mummys and Babies constantly then at least I can look at some art while I'm there. Everytime I see him I hear 'I got chills, they're multiplying...and I'm loooooosing control'. I guess it's some sort of social justice that after all the years of womankind being wolf whistled at and ogled by pervy builders, that I can right the wrong by watching him work with pure delight. Anyway, he said 'Hi' to me this morning and gave me a wave and suddenly I was donning my black spandex and some pretty poodley curls and squishing a cigarette with my peep toe shoes and saying 'Tell me about it, stud' in a rather inexplicable way. So, then at lunch, we were eating outside, and I could barely contain myself from staring at him while I was eating my raspberries and the dad of the family said to me 'Careful, you'll hurt your neck' and then said 'I think you fancy him.' Well, I looked at him deadpan and said 'I think you're right.' Well, the silver lining to my incorrigibility, they're all calling him Danny now. I'm terrible...

This afternoon I went to the zoo with the kiddies, and you know who was there??? Fizzy Man!! If you don't remember, Fizzy Man is the imaginary boyfriend of the little girl who sometimes calls and texts her, except the scandalous thing is that apparently he is now my boyfriend yet continued to contact me through her phone. He's cheeky, our Fizzyman. Anyway, I had a creative afternoon of Fizzy Man spotting with the kids, and I had them convinced that he had been allowed to go swimming with the seals and had played a rousing game of football with them while he was there. They were very jealous.

So, there you have it, Fizzy Man and I have plans now to drink a carbonated drink and some Haribo sours..because both these things are fizzy. Like him.

We bid you adieu.

Would you like butter or jam...boree?

Sunday morning walk

Are ya well, cuz you're looking well! ;)

Here we are again, at the cusp of something happening...probably my tangible grasp of reality slipping imperceptibly. But something anyway.

As we stand I am the proud survivor of another weekend. And it's been a pretty good one! Saturday was a big challenge for me- being alone for an entire day with the children. I was so scared I'd mess up...but I was also super determined to prove my critics wrong that I could do it without any help. And I did.

There were a few funny moments on the day. I was chuffed that they downed huge plates of the sausage and mash I made at lunch as they are usually pretty meagre eaters. Must have been good. Who am I kidding...I'm practically a professional masher. It probably helped that I did an amazing interpretive chipolata sausages song and dance while I was cooking. Yep, that one went down well!

Para-para-paradise

I had a nice time mid afternoon when we went up to Mariastein to see the end of the vintage car rally which the parents were competing in. I enjoyed a momentary reprise and had a lovely chilled glass of Feldschlossen (the lovely local beer) and then my friend came and met me there and we did a geek-tastic tour of the huge monastery in the village. I had a paranoid moment when my shoulders were uncovered in the church so had to drape my cardigan but nobody seemed to care. The confession booths had a light on top which lit up when there was a booth available- really made me laugh! Also went to a very scientific and interesting exhibition...just a shame the explanation was all in German so I had to make an educated guess at most of the content of the exhibition. Seen lots of pictures of poor Jesus- why is it always the saddest moments of his life portrayed? I'd love to see a picture of him laughing with villagers or talking to the disciples, you know?

I made the colossal mistake of making Willy Winky funny near to bed time. I asked them the very philosophical question that was 'You know the way Willy Winky comes to the houses at 8 o'clock? What happens if he really needs to do a stinker at just that moment?' It resulted in an explosive round of shouting Stinky Winky and raspberry blowing which had them very hyped up before bed.

It's France!

 Sunday morning I went for a stunning walk out in the country. The weather was just perfect, so warm and dry but not yet scorching like the rest of the day was. I found myself standing on the top of a hill, with France and Switzerland laid out before me side by side and I had such a giddy moment of 'I'm in two places at once!' One of my life goals fulfilled :)

Next up, sand on a beach...

After my walk, I felt very chilled, I put on my jazzy new green trousers, and I went into the city to meet up with BB. We were going to do the whole tourist thing because sometimes when you first arrive at a place you just don't go exploring straight away until you find your footing. Safe to say, we've well and truly found our feet now. That's one of my favourite things about BB. He really likes to be daring and spontaneous. He lives life a lot closer to the edge than I do. He doesn't get worried or scared by rules, or fear of getting lost, or anything like that. He does things with the utmost conviction that somehow it'll all work out, no matter how lost you get. He's a cool guy.

New present...for me??

We saw some really funny sights while we were there. While walking down a random sort of back street (spontaneous short cut...edgy) we happened to stumble into...a scout jamboree. What?? It was mega cool, with stalls and cool wooden dens, and stalls of info and a bbq. Completely wacky! Next up, we stumbled down towards the Rhine. We came across this weird sort of party storage thing where there was loads of crates and chairs and, much to BB's delight, a box of fine looking tall beer glasses. He took one. Daring. Oh, the vicarious adrenaline rush! Meanwhile, I had my own adrenaline rush when I slipped on some wet moss and nearly fell into the fast flowing Rhine. Stupid flip flops!

Stunning, no makeup working photo, with the pretty Healey in background :)

We also went and geeked around another church and admired the archictecture of the Munster and all the general old buildings- things were made so much better then. We went to McDonalds for lunch- I was loving it, haven't been there in aaages so it seemed all fresh and new. Got my classic order of McChicken Sandwich with chips and coke. Classic. Did consider the happy meal...but the toy wasn't up to much!

In the afternoon, we headed to Paddys as usual to meet the gang to watch some sport. This week's new sport for me: Hurling. I loved it. Wish I'd seen more of it before. It's so fast-paced and engrossing, I couldn't believe it when we reached half-time, and when it ended, went so quickly. We were all cheering on the underdog team and they ended up tie-ing with the other team so it was really cool to all be cheering together and feeling like part of something. There's talk of the Basel lot forming teams for GA, Hurling and Camogie. I'm really considering giving Camogie a go. From what I can gather...it's like hockey but you can sometimes use your stick as more of a weapon, and you barrel into people in true rugby tackle style. And if you knock someone out...it's not always a yellow card. Fantastic.

Today I went to a lovely swimming pool place behind the beautiful castle in Bottmingen with the children. It was really cool. I only got to go to the kiddies pool but across the bridge there seems to be an epic swimming pool with a water slide and everything...maybe someday I'll go back while I'm not working and give that slide a whirl.

Also, I totally ordered mince at a meat counter in Coop entirely in German...I'm like a pro now. Except for when I try to set up a bank account and an entire post office have to join in to help with the translation.I swear my life is sometimes like an Indie European subtitled movie. Deffos getting a bike with a basket next to ride down all the cobbled streets. And to put a baguette in.

Perving and Pirates

My view over the Rhine

There comes a time in every traveller's life when they just have to stop for a moment and reflect on just how lucky they are to be where they are when they are. I had that moment yesterday when I managed to find my way to the Rhine via a very convenient period in which I was completely lost. When I got up to the viewing point in Munsterplatz though, it all just became worthwhile again being here.

Although I might just shoot out anecdotes like a drug addict with a heroine needle, I also appreciate the true genuine beauty of the simple things in life. So I took some pictures. Surrounded by tourists. Like I was also a tourist. Except in a week's time they'll be back home and I'll still be riding the crazy expat train. Destination: Transcension...or insanity.

But now, as you all sit there- maybe in your pyjamas- oh cheeky! or maybe drinking a cup of tea- cheeky! Or maybe in the background watching a little TV or listening to The Archers while reading this- RUDE- perhaps you can see me not just as that wacky anecdotal call for help (seriously...why has no one responded?) but as an actual functioning human being with tear ducts and emotion and...oh heck, if you know me at all then you know I definitely have a bit too much of those! (You can tell I know my audience, can't you?) Except for you lovely randomers- thank you for reading as well! :D Jeepers, I sound like a Vlogger- apologies!

I had this eery feeling earlier on that there was something supernatural in the room. Mainly because the little girl was humming to herself while I did the dishes, and her special little voice she does sometimes sounds freakily like Gollum when he sings in Lord of the Rings...I was just waiting to hear 'Oohhh poor Smeagle...smeeeeeagle!' Freaky Friday! Ooh and it is Friday...bazinga!

I've spent my afternoon pretending to be a pirate. So, yeah, time well spent. I made cool pirate hats and we had a boat and I was fully in character as a rough and ready Captain, who wouldn't let no ladies on boar as 'we'd be cursed to kingdom come, aaarrrgh!' If anybody knows my accent, then they'll know it's not much of a stretch for me to be an entirely brilliant pirate. And I was. Unfortunately we were home alone and the door went so I had to answer with my pirate hat on and for some reason...high heels??

Yesterday I went to the park with the little girl and it was really a successful trip. You know how I know it was successful?? Because we both encountered our crushes while out and about. There's this boy who works as a mechanic and he looks like this. Yep, blooming Hugh Dancy. With a cheeky grin. I'm a sucker for engineering/mechanical sorts anyway, it's the whole hands on aspect (hey you, mind out of gutter!) but ;) great minds, eh? So, we were just walking past the garage he's walking towards us and I mean, I've exchanged a few back and forth 'Hallos' before, but she just shouts at him 'HELLO!' so of course he grins at me and then says 'Hallo'. It's weird, I find myself blushing really stupidly when he greets me. It doesn't help to always have an embarassing toddler in tow. Particularly when she then asks 'Do you know him?' after all her shouting. I haven't had a really stupid blushing crush since I was about 15 and I used to arrange run ins with the cute boy from the year above who used to eat his lunch near you. Gosh, I wonder what he's up to now, last I heard he was a pilot now in Belgium...wow, I still wouldn't say no. I also wouldn't say no to Hugh Dance(with me) Mechanic

So yeah, I ran into Hugh Dancy several times yesterday and the little girl was completely mesmerised by this little boy in the park. To be fair, he was a real cutie. But she insisted on doing everything he did, even climbing up way to high and swinging really quickly. It's cute, she knows him from play group but has so far been too shy to ask his name. And she's not shy. Anything but. Guess she's a little tongue tied. I thought it was hilarious though. So I've decided to encourage it as much as possible. I just really want to see her with a little boyfriend. Plus, they'd look really cute together. Going with the whole blonde and a brunette must have!

Wait a minute...I'm match making toddlers!

To add to my previous Freaks on a Tram post, had a particularly sleazy journey on the tram yesterday. With four key points of interest.

As soon as I left the house, there was a mysterious wolf whistle I heard that flew past me in a car but did not stay around for long.

Next up, walking towards me was a man who made some kissy noises to his left, as if to a dog, but when I reached that point and looked over...there was no dog.

Next up, I made it to the tram stop and there were two creepy looking builders who were leering at me and holding some very suggestive seeming tools (although probably not their fault if things were a bit phallic)

Now I'm pretty confused by all this as I'm not even remotely dressed alluringly. I think some people are just...strange. And I know that's ironic coming from me.

Finally, much to everybody's relief, I was brought back to earth with a crash landing on my journey home. Witnessed a girl who seemed to be on a date with her friend and her friend's boyfriend. They were sitting together cuddling and she was just sitting alone, pretending to text on her phone, feeling like a bit of a loser. It took me right back to my teenaged days... ahh the accompanying friend move- that was a depressing position! Then the couple got off, and I looked around me, and it was just me and the most spinster looking group of women left, all travelling alone, in one carriage.

And we all lived happily ever after...we opened a cat sanctuary! :D

And that's when the crazy woman shouted...

Hello and how are you? Here we are, another day, another shenanigan. That's a good word, isn't it? Shenanigan! The thing about good words though is that sometimes they are not easily applicable to most sentences. For example, I couldn't say 'Check out the shenanigan on that one!' and that is what most of my sentences consist of...because I'm a judgmental critter- I'm not.

There have been a few funny things I've been up to the last day and a half or so. Prepare to be regaled ;)

First of all, I decided to educate the little girl on the music that I enjoy so we were listening to some Taylor Swift on Spotify. As soon as a picture of Taylor appeared on the screen, the little girl said, 'That is you?' I love it! Yeaah..that's me if I was a millionaire and a bit taller and could get my hair to control itself a bit more. I'll take that compliment. I've really started to appreciate having such a young friend. She is so blunt. I ask her if my outfit is okay/ if she likes my hair/ if my make up is nice. My favourite is asking 'Do I look fat today?' because she always responds 'No' in a really 'Duh' way. It stops me thinking 'I shouldn't have had that extra Gruyere.' You know?

It might sound like I am a loner, but a lot of my anecdotes in this blog are things I have done on my lonesome. Call me a loner geek but I seem to recall on my earlier mentioned Bucket List (a few entries ago) that I was going to learn how to spend time alone and really become comfortable with just myself for company. And I can do it. It is such an exhilirating feeling to eat alone somewhere. Or read your book in complete silence. Or browse clothes shops for all the time you need. Because when I go with friends, I always go where they go in the shop so we can chat. But when it's allllll in my head, I can go wherever I like. Freeing!

I had another freeing moment yesterday when I went to my language course. Before it started, I rushed to the toilets as usual (because the thought of class gets me so excited I need to pee apparently). My ipod was still playing while I went there and, lo and behold, 'Sexy and I know It' started playing. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wyx6JDQCslE&oref=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fresults%3Fsearch_query%3Dsexy%2Band%2Bi%2Bknow%2Bit%26oq%3Dsexy%2Band%2Bi%2Bknow%2Bit%26gs_l%3Dyoutube.3...208.2339.0.4383.15.13.0.0.0.0.344.1451.6j6j0j1.13.0...0.0...1ac.zy7niy9tUOU&has_verified=1
I had a sneaky look around me and then I just let loose. I danced, readers. I danced like I was an edgy gangster hipster. I danced embarassingly. I danced big. I, in fact, risked it to get the biscuit. There was always that moment of 'Will I get caught?' And then I looked out the window and I was fully visible to the busy square below, should anyone wish to look upwards. I am legend. Sorry Will Smith.

The Swiss countryside is a lovely idyllic place, I find. It's just perfect for when you are walking along and Duck Soup's 'Barbara Streisand' comes on your ipod. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Io3aSEkG_s and you absolutely MUST shout out your own name instead of Barbara Streisand. Try it sometime. It was very fun for me ;)

The countryside was not so idyllic this morning. For some reason, a massive herd of dogs all took to barking at once. It got me a bit on edge. I couldn't help but feel like I was suddenly in that scene near the start of 101 Dalmations where the dogs all start barking to try and find the puppies. I half expected Cruella De Vil to show up in a Transit Van with two unlikely lads and a sack of puppies...the only person I did see seemed to be shovelling twigs into his trailer and was a dead ringer for Santa Clause. That beard.....wow!

And an update on the little doppelganger I have at the kindergarten. I have now noted another similarity. She lifts up her friends! Like...constantly! That's what I do, that's what I've done for years. Even if they were impossibly heavy men who were partial to muscles. You don't see many 5 year olds lifting other 5 year olds! Also, a random little boy this morning thought I was my doppelganger's mother- it's not just me sees the similarity! Magical.

Last night something truly magical was discovered... I was out at Paddys as usual, drinking beer and watching the US Open of Tennis, talking to my friend, when we tried something truly remarkable. Chips, right? Proper potato yummy chips. Covered with homemade Chilli Con Carne with lots of Kidney Beans yum yum yum and absolutely OOOODLES of cheese- lovely Swiss cheese. It was divine. Every bite I took from start to finish, I just had to say 'Ooooh! Yum!'

Get some.

;)

Freaks on a Tram

Coming this blog post to a computer screen right in front of you, I bring you Freaks on a Tram...from the maker of some extreme social faux pas and some pretty entertaining blog posts, be afraid.

Nobody is safe on the tram. Well, that's a bit drastic. I'm not that safe...but that's because I seem to attract absolute weirdos! No offence to any of my friends, I don't mean you guys!

It's not so much that I never feel safe on the trams. I do normally. Just in the past few days I've encountered a strangely high proportion of slightly bizarre people ranging from the odd quirks to the full on creeps.

Anyway, as you can see from my rather brilliant (I know, it's terrible!) film poster to the left, you get all sorts! And there hasn't been a man with a roast chicken on his head chasing me or anybody shouting 'Here's Johnny!' as the poster would suggest...although the chicken chaser would actually be pretty hilarious...

So, I will briefly incorporate my top three creepiest encounters into a rhyming song (you can make up the tune yourself!) Don't I spoil you all? ;)

On Saturday, to my dismay,
I seen a somewhat normal boy
He took to grinning at me there,
And acting mighty coy.

Unfortunately, I did there see,
A constant sniffer of armpits,
As between his smiles to me,
He really sniffed with true grit.

On Sunday afternoon
A man came and sat beside me,
He decided it would not be weird,
To try and reach to touch me

He pointed at my hands, my face,
He made a scary sight,
He asked 'Warum?' and pointed
And really gave me quite a fright.

On my walk home, to my surprise
A group of men I saw there,
They were gathered into a group,
And made noise without a care.

To my chagrin,
A chime did begin,
They made the sounds of a telephone,
And really made me wish for home.

I don't know why, but it seemed less psychologically damaging if I made it a song instead. :-/

In other news, as is the tradition of my blog, I'll give you a run down of my latest happenings and events.

On Saturday, I went to visit my friend Kevin in a city called Aarau. The train there was pretty uneventful although a weird man did sit next to me and try and chat while loudly slurping his red bull. Great. We did all the sights (well, what we could see through the downpour) and wandered through a jumble sale where Kev tried to buy some binoculars from a big box only to be told by the man in a weird broken German/French language that 'These are mine. You can't have them.' We went out for pizza and strolled around with a rather malfunctioning umbrella.

It was a lovely chance to talk, and I can just talk to him for hours without stopping (much to his annoyance). It's so nice to have made such a good friend already in a new country. Plus, he's an Irish lad so we don't have any language barriers. Maybe just a sarcasm one. He's also such a gentleman, he was kind enough to pay for things and to hold an umbrella over me- have I mentioned before how much I love people being gentlemen- they're my favourite kind of men species!

There were some funny sights to be seen. A man dressed as a bear who gave out honey in exchange for cuddles...and money- typical Switzerland! There were a whole group of people playing bongos just for fun-sies, and I wondered whether they might have been a cult. I confronted my fear of freight trains and we just generally had a fabioso time!
 
On Sunday, I went for a lovely walk in the morning- there's nothing like listening to Johnny Cash as you walk towards France to clear your head. The dog and I were both wrecked afterwards though. 

In the afternoon I made my way into Paddys for my first ever taster of a Gaelic Football match. It was a nice chance to just chat with all the Irish crew and just generally have a merry time of things. It wasn't quite the 12 hour situation of the Sunday before but it was a good afternoon/evening. The BILL society was formed, I learnt the rules of a new sport, and the drink was flowing merrily.

Today, and I will leave you with this anecdote, I discovered that the little girl has two girlfriends and a boyfriend who regularly ring her on her toy mobile phone. It's funny how accurate she is. The girls are really needy and keep ringing her and then she groans and is a bit of a man about things...anyway, I asked her what her boyfriend was called earlier and this is the conversation we had:

Me: Who was that on the phone?
Her: My boyfriend
Me: Oh dear, is he ringing you again?
Her: Yeah...lots
Me: What's his name, anyway?
Her: FizzyMan
Me...WHAT???

Fizzy man??? Where does she even get these things?? I am a little concerned about her polygamous bisexual imaginary world though, I must say...

On a lower point, she also got knocked off her bike by a ginger boy with ADHD... nicht so spass!

So the moral is: Stay away from freaks on trams...and from gingers with a shifty look.