May Angels Lead You In...some friends?

Hello...is it me you're looking for?? No, Lionel buddy, it is not either of us they are looking for! Because, apparently, I am really struggling to make friends here. It's not that I'm just being difficult. I just live in the country and I don't get to meet many people. It's a crying shame, that is! Any offers, Swiss readers??

L'Aventure Peugeot- the museeeee in France

Anyway, I'm not gonna be one of those ranty mcranters, who just moan on their blogs, unless of course it's with regards to SOTPM in which case we all enjoy a good moan about him, because we are his biggest fans, aren't we guys? But blaaargh, he's not being mentioned until I have good reason to do so!

 Previously in my life, I posted that rather melancholy post on Sunday  at lunch time.  Hilariously,within the space of a melancholy breakfast, melancholy lunch and some general mopey-ness- the unthinkable happened.

There I was, enjoying a mopey coffee and reading a magazine article about a model who likes eating, when the roar of a car arrived. Then another one. Then another one. Then another one. Minis. Vintage ones. Men. Six of them. After being introduced, I was whisked into a mini with a lovely man called Andre, and we all sped off in procession towards France. My life, eh??

Here we are arriving at the musuem: Andre and I. Not my words.

Don't believe me? Check it out, four mini parked together in the car park- what??







I had a whale of a time! For the first time in ages I was the only girl amongst a group of men. Plus, they were much older than me so really treated me nicely. They held doors for me. They bought my lunch and my tickets and my drinks. They called me a lady. They complimented me. They helped me. I loved the looks other people gave our group: six older men and one young girl- we must have looked fantastically weird!

So that was a delightful time in the afternoon, one of my happiest days so far. It was such a lovely drive into the country side too. Such a novelty for me to be being one minute in Switzerland and the next in France. Inconceivable! Plus, I had such lovely conversations with Andre the whole way there and back. And I might even have gotten a new reader for my blog...could it be true??

The second ever Peugeot car- and my favourite

In other news, the pursuit for finding me a prospect is continuing. Today a young man of roughly his 20s was getting his van fixed on site and I was quickly informed. It was suggested maybe I could go subtly play with the little girl outside, just to get introduced. I felt like a Victorian debutante. Until the child said 'Go Away' and hit me. Lovely job I have. Plus, although I enjoyed his initially flummoxed expression when I suddenly appeared in front of him, I got introduced dismissively as 'the au pair' and therefore got instantly dismissed as an absolute dunce who couldn't do anything else with her life. Dragging the child off to the other side of the yard, I tried to look casual in my denim shorts and pink fluffy slippers as I got ran into with a toy truck and got forced to dig through some dead leaves. He was very taken with me, I'm sure. Still, I did get a kick out of watching him trying and failing several times to reverse his van back out of the driveway. He was no SOTPM.


Today, I had to accompany the little one to Playgroup for half an hour, as she was too sad to stay alone. After a few games of cooking, I witnessed one of the earliest bitch faces I've ever seen in a life. This TERRIFYING toddler kept coming over and stealing things we were using. She'd then parade around the room with them and suddenly chuck them at us while looking really evil. You should have seen the two toddlers circle each other- like a chick flick frenemy montage!

This evening I got sent to my first language class. I had high hopes that I might meet some nice people my own age and FINALLY have places to go and people to do things with. It's no fun knowing you're in the way always being here. Plus, it gets really depressing to just stay where you work all the time. And the work is HARD. So I got on the tram with high hopes.

Where I'm going to end up, in a strait jacket, after my mental break.

Those quickly plummetted. For ages, it was only me and the teacher. Then a Turkish girl showed up. With an older woman who must have been somehow connected to her. Then a Brazilian girl. And that was it. Apparently if we don't get anymore members then our class is getting cancelled...yay! There goes my hopes of learning German! I thought the Brazilian girl was about the same age as me and we might get on. Alas, she is married with three children: the oldest of which is TWELVE!!!!!! The other two were both older too and the Turkish girl kept trying to correct me on things so I took to trying to beat her to every single right answer. Ha! And I succeeded.

Jazzy...

The only people who did really address me in town, with the exception of patronising Turkish girl and the teacher, were an absolute dead ringer for Whoopi Goldberg who was sitting in front of me on the tram and offered me some friendly advice when I couldn't get off the tram at my stop...like an IMBECILE! I really wanted to yell  'Thank you, Whooopiiii!!' The only other person to address me was a short teenaged boy who appeared to be auditioning for a Jay Z impersonation gig and looked like he might have been from the Phillipines who said 'Heeeellllo' in what I assume was meant to be a sleazy way which I quite frankly ignored. So an abundance of social opportunities, as you can see!

On the plus side, 1) I have totally gotten tanned without a single bit of sun burn. Like as in, people actually comment on it. 2) People keep mistaking me for a native and asking me for advice and directions. 3) And the mosquitoes here don't mind me one bit! Unlike those stupid Tiger Mozzies in Spain!4) Travelling Salesman totally emailed me back today. Turns out the reason we didnt meet up for some fun on Sunday was because he had to go back to London early due to a knee injury. Now we're penpals! And if there's anything I have a real aptitude for, except for giving the wolf in Red Riding Hood an exceptionally fine American accent, it's keeping up correspondences with people at a distance who never have to see me whatsoever!

QOTR

Gesundheit and such

Only a short post today, readers, as I just discovered my travel adaptor isn't suitable for Switzerland...as well as being the one Euro country without the euro, it also doesn't have european adaptor plugs so as such, my laptop and phone are both going to die out imminently and I will be cut off from technology *goes mad slowly* Arrrrgh!!

I'll just give you the highlights: I'm here safely 'in der nahe von' Basel, I've met the family who are so nice. The parents are looovely and funny, I know we're going to get on well! The children are desperate for my attention, at the expense of my hair (which has become a toy), their bodies (covered in injuries) and the decency of human kind (they've been screaming a lot). If they'd just calm down I know we'd get on great too. They're fantastic when they do quiet down.

It's amazing how fast I've picked up the basic instincts of this whole parenting thing. I am managing surprisingly well, I have now seen more bare bottoms than a nudist might have, as they are often thrust towards me for inspection during the course of the day.

There have been a few surreal moments already. Zurich airport was surreal. After arriving in our terminal, we were ushered a mile or so onto an inner airport subway which played what I assumed was the soundtrack of Switzerland: involving bird song, trumpets, bells ringing, yodelling, male voice choirs and some very angry cows. I couldn't resist a snigger or two to myself. Next up we walked through a ridiculously long queue of customs, where I eventually got to pick up my bag. By the time I eventually got to the train station, after lugging two suitcases down four flights of stairs all alone, I had to queue for 20 minutes in the slowest ticket queue in the world. I eventually got to order my ticket in pigeon German, only to discover I had missed the final direct train to Basel. I was ordered down the stairs to Platform 3...only problem, when I got down the stairs, there was only platform two and three. Meanwhile I could see Platform 3 in the distance, but there were lots of rail tracks between me and there...arrrgh! I raced back up the stairs, and managed to find the RIGHT staircase and pelted towards my train to Zurich which was standing there. With the doors shut. In the UK that means a train is leaving. Thankfully, I ambushed an attractive man with a bike and he got me on to the train phew!

I was veeeery relieved to finally make it to my final connection in Zurich and sit down on a train and down a bottle of water. Thank the Lord!

Seeing the family on the platform was a welcome surprise and conversation came easy. We made our way into the pouring rain while I apologised profusely that I had indeed brought the weather with me, as they had had perfect sunshine until I arrived. It also rained all day today. Uhoh.

In other news, I picked blackberries, saw France within touching distance, crossed a river on a single unattached plank, saw a young male deer frollicking, oodles of pear trees, cherry trees, walnut trees (basically any thing on a tree I seen...except for a stupid excuse for a tween romance carving their stupid names on a tree. Thank goodness!

I also witnessed approximately 10 temper tantrums, some remarkable acrobatics, and my utter despair that after I finish this, I am officially cut off from the world... goodbye for now, here's hoping my poor mother can find me the right adaptor. Otherwise it's goodbye indefinitely.... dear goodness, please no!